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Today I found myself in a car with a young man who works for one of the main television channels in Australia. Kudos to me ...

Thats about where it ends. My first excitement ended when he lent over to kiss me the minute he picked me up, not just a nice French Schoolgirl kiss, but a tiny bit of probing tongue ...
a tad inappropriate!

I'm a very busy girl you see, these days I struggle to find a night to myself and frequently double book myself and juggle so that I am able to do multiple things in one evening.

Tonight I decided to go out with TV guy before we both went out to our respective functions.

Here we were parked on the side of the road, and he lowers his voice and says 'Are you horny?' I'm quite a flirt and played along, until he parks up and reaches over to try his luck ... Woah buddy, I'm not that kind of girl!! Maybe I am, but just not tonight ...

Before I can say anything, his pants are off and he's in the drivers seat and eying up the back ...
on one side of the road is a brick wall, on the other is someones backyard complete with back porch light on and washing on the line ...

Finding my predicament somewhat amusing I started laughing and couldn't stop.
'Whats the matter?'
Do I really have to say anything?
'Is it me?'
um well you are a little forward ...
'you seemed so kinky, don't you want to shag in here? Theres more room in the backseat?'

I apologized for giving him the wrong idea and he asked if I minded if he finished off before we left.

Be my guest ... I don't think you'll be seeing this face again...

I’m your private dancer …

A dancer for money, I’ll do what you want me to do…

I recently took up Pole Dancing; the first time I went with the hope that I could perhaps learn to dance seductively to pick up guys, and having the skills of a pole dancer couldn’t hurt in the bedroom right??

When I told people that I was going to pole dancing, the reaction was incredible, guys practically fell over themselves. With that reaction, I was even more excited about classes.

After my first class I realised that this would be a great way to get fit and tone myself, and I wasn’t quite as bad as I thought I would be! In fact, maybe, just maybe, I could become a pole dancer? I have the tits, I have the ass, and perhaps a few lessons down the track I will have the rhythm, body tone and the fitness required for this to be a viable option.

At my second class I was reminded that I didn't quite have the rhythm, but I was getting the hang of things and rhythm will come eventually ...

I’ve signed up for 8 weeks of dancing, and my last class will be the 2^nd October; I’ve also recently resigned from my respectable corporate job, so this date will also coincidentally be my 2^nd day of unemployment. Kevin Rudd supports strippers, so obviously this is a career track worth exploring, and what better way to further disappoint my mother? I’ll update you on my progress!

The deciding factor

Today, I need your opinion … Think about this, and share your thoughts; have you ever been in a similar situation?

You’re in the throws of passion with a new guy …
You make it to the bedroom …
All your clothes are off and the two of you are ready to go …
Then you realise you’ve forgotten to ask an important question …
So you ask …
Pirates or Ninjas?

He has no idea what you’re talking about … you ask for a snap decision between the two, and he chooses Pirates …

Should you still shag him?

Old Man Willard

I tend to get a little ahead of myself sometimes and maybe should have mentioned that I did have a boy on the side for quite some time. It was nothing serious, every now and then you have an itch that needs scratching, and this was my go-to guy, you know, for after all the dates that don’t work out etc …
The sex was great to begin with and we had a lot of fun together. But as I mentioned before I get bored pretty quickly, and the sex didn’t change and became pretty average towards the end … I made excuses for not being able to see him;
He wanted to stay friends;
I said I was seeing someone new …
He wanted to stay friends and said lets just go out for a drink,I cheat on my fake boyfriend with him …
Everything is so much more fun with a bit of risk involved …
Once again, we’re back to average and I resolve that this is it!
I say goodbye with some restraint.
Enter Navy Boy!

Oh yeah, because we’re not disclosing names here, I’ve entered this post under his cats name, yes that’s right he had a cat, how did he even make it past first base to begin with?! And, I’m going to let the cats name make fun of itself …

Enter Navy Boy

I recently met a boy off the internet, was it the first time, No, but this is about as close as I will get to admitting that I’ve actually done it! Out of boredom and curiosity, I signed myself up for a dating website. What was I looking for, I don’t know! All I can say is that there have been plenty of boys in my life over the years and no boyfriend. The problem is that no one can really hold my attention for long enough. Most of my friends are in relationship after relationship, and I can’t say that I’m not a little jealous!! But the fact of the matter is, I just don’t see why I should put so much effort into seeing someone when I just don’t see anything serious happening. Or maybe I just don’t want to get my heart broken?! Whatever it is I know one thing, the day I settle down into a relationship is the day things get very boring around here! Which of my goings on don’t involve some random guy?

Bear in mind that most of the time, when I re-tell stories, I really so sit back and listen to myself and think about how stupid I can be; but the anthem still stands, It seemed a good idea at the time … I’d semi made plans to go out with this guy for dinner, sadly though, I’ve had the dreaded flu of late, and wasn’t really up for going out – rather than waste an opportunity, I said why don’t you just come over to mine and hang out, I’m bored here by myself anyway … S.M.A.R.T! He turns up, and as always looked completely different from the photos I had seen! He was much hotter than I originally thought!

So we watched a couple of movies, got to know each other a little better, and one thing led to another and he ended up staying over. My bad! I’m such a naughty girl sometimes! He had to leave early that morning for work, so I showed him to the door, and crawled back to bed until a respectable hour of the day arrived.

Much to my surprise and excitement he sent me a txt message that morning and later in the afternoon.

We went out to lunch the next day at my local, and had a couple of rounds of pool, he let me win the first being the gentleman that he is let me win the game.

– note to self: don’t let looks deceive you, he may have a respectable job and great dress sense, but once a bogan always a bogan! –

So anyway, we came back to mine for a while then had to head off to work … damn you Australian Defence Force!

In case you haven't noticed, I tend to get excited over nothing, it lasts for a short time, then I start looking for something new; at this point I'm still in the excited phase and all going well I should see Navy boy again in about a week schedules permitting.

… until that time …

It’s not ALL true what they say about you lot!! Thanks for the workout Navy-Boy!

Newcastle Delivers!

I went to Newcastle a couple of weekends back with a couple of mates and we made a mess of ourselves out on the town giving the locals a run for their money. The girls I was out with went home for the night and I found myself going back to a hotel room with a bloke I had met earlier in the night. Morning came, and upon realizing that this was one of those large apartment type hotel rooms and that he wasn’t alone, I decided that it would be wise to bid my farewells and leave before morning introductions. After slipping past the knowing eyes of the hotel concierge, I pondered how I would make my way to the address that I should have been staying.
Usually when I am in a strange place I will write the address on my arm in bold letters so that I can easily find my way home, should I become inebriated and completely incapacitated; but not this time. I had no idea of the address or the suburb at which I was staying… All I could remember was that it was about 40 minutes drive away from the city. And there was a yacht club down the road. I went to find a cafe for breakfast or something open to chill out at while the rest of the sleepy town could open their eyes and I could find someone to point me in the right direction, sadly, NOTHING was open!

I knew one thing for certain, if I was going to make it home I would need at least one thing. Money! So I made my way to the closest ATM hearing a voice say “you know it’s been a good one if you’ve spent all your cash the night before”. And before I can hear myself plead stranger danger, I’m accepting a lift home with an overweight, bald guy in his late 30’s. Okay, so he might not have been bald …

Conversation flowed in what I assume was his wife’s people mover, as he told me about being married, his young daughter and life as an accountant having no vices *yawn*
He asked for my number, being the harmless chap that he was and I gave it to him, after all he was giving me a lift home that was well out of his way!!
Good Samaritans always remind me that I should be doing more to pay it forward!

We reached the Yacht Club, my final destination, and he, knowing that I didn’t have a whole lot of money to my name puts $50 on my knee; “I’m going to send you a message, and this is so that you can reply”.
“Who do you think I am? Some kind of hooker? You can’t buy me”!!
“I’m not trying to buy you; I’m just giving you the means to reply to me”.
“If you call me, I will reply because I want to, I don’t want to be obliged to answer”.
He accepted that put his money away, and I got out of the car. I waved him goodbye and tried to remember which way I should go to from here. I knew it was up a rather large hill, so I headed towards the steepest street I could see. Listening out for cars, a little paranoid that he could follow me, but knowing that if he had wanted to try anything that he would have done so already.
I rounded the corner out of sight of the main road when my phone goes off.
“You are a nice girl, I am impressed. I want you, want to go somewhere quiet?”
Woah!! “No, sorry you're married.”
”My wife and I have fun playing around. she would know about it and even be involved if you want”.
Wow!! What am I a threesome magnet??! Seriously!! That’s probably a story for another time though!! Still being curious I asked - Can you send me a picture of your wife?

Now apparently his wife is very excited about me :-P

How do I get myself into these situations I ask you??! Who knows, the wife wasn’t really my type, and the messages have since fizzled out, but as always, its fun while it lasted!!!

This blog is unique and different, just like every other blog on the net!!

Hi, my name is Marie and I will be your captain for not only this evening but for subsequent voyages through unknown territory – Unknown Territory that is me!

I plan on posting in full the crazy zany goings on in my life in their un-edited glory. My friends often joke that listening to the weird and crazy things I get up to trumps the goings on in even the most sophisticated soap opera. So enough musings for now; you will get to surmise your own opinions of me from the comings and goings of these pages, all I ask is that you sit back, relax, and let the good times roll. And I wouldn’t think any less of you if you actually posted a comment every now and again either!